May. 18th, 2007

scary_manilow: (cramps)
First things first: The Replay Lounge was voted one of the top bars in the country by Esquire Magazine... In a bizarre moment of postmodern meta-journalism, the local newspaper decided to write an article about the Esquire article, which apparently involved interviewing Nick Carroll about how it felt ot be interviewed. Some people look into a mirror and glimpse infinity, other people just see themselves staring back.


That's me in the upper right-hand corner, green shirt, doing my best Jack Nicholson impression.

In other news, [ profile] secret_malady and I have decided to give up our microwave in hopes of greatly reducing the radiation levels in our household... Well, that, and the fact that our counter space looks so much better without it:

Junk Shrine

I've been so obsessed with the idea of brain tumors and blood cancer lately that the idea of a microwave-free diet fills my pants with glee. That fucking machine pump so many x-rays into our house, into our food, and into our bellies that I don't know how we've made it this far without spewing The Big C from every orifice... Since we don't have cable, I don't spend much time in front of the tube, flipping channels... And since I don't have a cell phone, I don't have to worry about getting one of those giant ear tumors that swallow up the entire side of your face. I don't smoke anymore, I haven't blown anyone with HPV lately, and as far as I know I'm not exposed to obscene levels of lead paint on a daily basis. So aside from spending half my day parked in front of a computer monitor, I'd like to think that I'm relatively safe from massive radiation exposure. And without a microwave polluting my life every day, those levels should drop even lower.

A good way to prevent cancer, I hear, is by ingesting as many raw fruits as possible. Keeps the ol' immune system in tip top condition. And what better way to boost those levels than with a freshly mixed tropical drink? Luckily for us, Hawaiian Theme Party season is upon us, and with the combination of THIS:

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

...which Ms. Malady's folks so thoughtfully donated to us last christmas, and THIS:

Cocktails for two!

...which I just picked up on the cheap at the Antique Mall, and THIS:

Tiki Bar

...which is currently on layaway for us at the same Antique Mall, and you have all the makings of a summer filled with Polynesian debauchery, all of it 100% health positive (rum is healthy for you, right?), and 100% tumor free (give or take a couple of tumors)... Who wants to join us?


scary_manilow: (Default)

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