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Before I get into the bitterness, here's something fun:

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Okay, then...

I work too much. It's official. It's one thing to have two jobs, it's something completely different when those jobs don't allow for any real sleep between shifts... Seriously, I spend four days out of every week clocking in at 4 am, going home at 1 pm, clocking in at 3 pm, going home at 10 pm. I usually fall asleep an hour after that, only to wake up again four-an-a-half hours later (if I'm lucky) so I can go back to work.

Is it any wonder I've been fucking the dough up at the bakery lately? Is it? My burnout level is at an all-time high. My boss left a message saying he wants to have a "discussion" with me this week... and I'm ready to tell him to go felch himself, I really am. I'm a pretty damned good employee, a total fucking workhorse, and I don't need some freaked-out ex-hippie coming down on me about every minor slip-up just because his ass is chapped. Especially when we have other employees who regularly show up late (and drunk), stand around smoking cigarettes all day, and clock out when they think no one is looking... Why not have a "discussion" with one of THOSE nimrods?

So I called in from the bar tonight just so I could have some quiet time for myself. And since "quiet time" usually equals "get drunk and spend money," I ended up with a copy of MONSTERS CRASH THE PAJAMA PARTY.

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The menu is almost impossible to navigate, and some of the footage is completely extraneous, but dammit, I'm pretty happy with this purchase. The Encyclopedia Britannica educational short about irrational fears is a hoot, and the main feature, "Tormented" is so awful and hilarious I can't believe it never turned up on MST3K... Also, any disc that begins with a whirling Hypnowheel is all aces in my book.

The downside: 3-D doesn't seem to work on television, at least not here. I was excited to see a pair of glasses incuded with the DVD, but the only thing that popped out when I put them on were my eyes... What a headache!

I had the fortune of spending some quality time with my daughter this weekend... I took her to see "the Corpse Bride" which she realy seemed to enjoy. Actually, she was bored as hell for the first fifteen minutes or so, until the first singing skeleton appeared... Then she was standing up in her seat, dancing. On the way out of the theater, she said, "I liked him when he put the ring on her hand and she came up out of the ground... It was CRAZY!"

She likes the copy of "Mad Monster Party" that I sent her so much that she opted to bring it along to watch... She's only had it for a week and she already knows most of the music and dialogue. Her favorite characters are The Wolf Man and Mr. Hyde, although she has to cover her eyes whenever Dr. jeckyll drinks his potion because the transformation process scares her.

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This week: [ profile] secret_malady and I are going to start writing some music, with or without our absentee bandmates. And I've got to finish putting my Halloween costume if it fucking kills me... I refuse to sit on the sidelines for two years in a row!
scary_manilow: (Default)
Oh, wow. I was going to take a moment to air out my current list of disappointments, but then I hopped online and saw THIS:

...and I realized that my problems are completely insignificant. There is simply to much evil in the world for me to dwell on my own disappointments.

My favorite line:

A source told America's Us Weekly magazine: "He has threatened to release raunchy footage of the two taken before Spears looked pregnant."

The "source" (which we can all agree is probably Britney's publicist) obviously wants to appear shocked, but her choice of words betrays this stance. Could this be a last ditch-effort to pump life into her gasping career? D'ya think? Oh, Ms. Federline, we hardly knew ye...

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So, the aforementioned disappointments, listed here in abbreviated form:

1. My daughter is getting her tonsils and adenoids removed next week. Unfortunately, I will most likely be locked up in the medical lab testing drugs, so I won't be able to visit her. To make up for this, I bought a DVD copy of MAD MONSTER PARTY for her to watch while recovering. I may not be a GOOD parent, but at least I'm a COOL one.

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2. The much-touted return of MOVIE NIGHT at the Jackpot was canceled last Sunday because the booking guy told a DJ he could come down and spin metal records instead. Being an asshole, he didn't bother to tell anyone about this, so we had to cancel everything at the last minute. All five people who showed up expecting to see WESTWORLD went home and cried themselves to sleep, I'm sure.

3. Speaking of the Jackpot, my tenure as an employee there has become increasingly irritating as of late. Sparse business coupled with lousy tips makes Gillaspie go something something... Like the fat guy who sat at the bar for an hour and a half, pounding shots of Rumplemints and referring to every woman on TV as a "fucking bitch." He was reading a book called "Tribal Quest For The Elven Princess" or something like that, and he tied a mean drunk on because his imaginary date never showed up to meet him. Thirty-some dollars worth of booze later, he stumbles away without leaving a fucking DIME in the tip jar... Did I mention he was my only customer that afternoon? Yeah.

Also, last night I had to rough up a little kid after he tried to sneak into the bar. I felt lousy about it for the rest of the night. I pulled him outside and he immediately started cursing at me. His friend tried to convince me to let him in because, in his words, "He's a functioning re-tard, man, you GOTTA let him in." Meanwhile, this "functioning re-tard" is babbling on a cell phone to his friends about what an asshole the doorguy is for throwing him out of the bar. I politely (but STERNLY) told him that I couldn't let him in because he had no ID, he was drunk, he was OBVIOUSLY underage... and above all, he'd tried to sneak through the door behind my back, which is a big time NO-NO. The kid said, "Just let it go, asshole," and pushed his hands against my chest, at which point I totally lost my mind, grabbed him by the shoulders, and threw him across the sidewalk. I was screaming all sorts of awful shit at him, and he eventually got up and ran away, screaming, "You fucking psycho!" and waving his middle finger at me.

Like I said, I felt lousy about it the rest of the night. He was just a kid, after all. But I was being polite as hell with him, and he decided to get physical anyway... If this had happened five ro six years ago, he'd be in the hospital and I'd be in jail. So I guess we're both lucky that I've mellowed with age.

Ah, well, at least I'm not THIS GUY:

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Massive flooding north fo town prduced this picture on the front page a few days back... In a perfect world, the attached quote would read, "If'n any of them thar looters reckon they can swim up yo my trailer home and get my collection of Chiefs shirts, they gonna hafta come through ME first! U! S! A!"


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August 2012

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